paul returns to the pmo and ainge returns to blogging

enough of the 60% of canadians who voted rejected alternatives and the liberals are back in business. yes, i know we all read inkless wells and my musings are sooo outdated, but i havent posted since the election. youd think this absence of diligence would mean im a time-unaware bc potsmoker, or something.

right. i've actually spent the last week re-adjusting to life sans campaigning, fiddling with this blog layout, and enjoying summer term at ubc.

of everything i ran into on a hectic election night, the image that sticks in my head is how livid mr shirley chan appeared to look. ouch.

and now, the roundup.

election, yay

1. stan keyes: GONE!! martin will have to repay his valiant crusader somehow...

2. ted white: GONE!! this man was truly a blemish. yes, ive resorted to petty slander. in ottawa, he castigated my coworkers and myself for answering the phone in french before english - as english is the majority language of canada, he explained, i should use english first. of course we all have ted white stories... curious how nobody predicted ex-mayor don bell would be the lower mainland liberal pickup of the night.

3. stephen owen owning vancouver-quadra: the man is my favourite mp, and i was afraid it was going to be sugar daddy rogers in a squeaker. i credit a spectacularly organized campaign machine, his independent thinking, noteworthy endorsements, and vancouver-wide fear of trojan horse social conservatism for his decisive win. more on insidious attack ads later in the post...

4. blair wilson: scaring the bejesus out of john reynolds is quite the achievement. cute how the perma-tanned mp spent the entire campaign fartcatching (to use frank parlance) around ontario for tory liabilities candidates such as cheryl gallant only to find some liberal almost plucked his seat.

5. green party: cashes in and will hopefully make it to the debates next time around. maybe people will be entranced by the green presence instead of lavishing praise on gilles duceppe like a bunch of clueless anglos who like to act like they've seen the light and are now so impossibly tolerant they suddenly love him. surely the way to fostering bilingualism and biculturalism in canada is to become intrigued by gilles duceppe as a quaint little freedom fighter. right.

election, lame

1. strategic voting: sometimes it screwed the liberals, sometimes it screwed the ndp, sometimes it screwed the conservatives. at any rate, it's hard to vote "strategically" when the polls have nought to do with the results.

2. negative ads: ok, so the warren was right, scaring people works. well, it seems to work well enough to salvage a sinking steamship on election day proper while yielding scattered results in polls. my non-politics friends (i don't know why i bother associating with them, really) all liked the liberal attack ad. this still puzzles me. yes, the conservatives are terrible, but surely we can figure that out without intimidation? i'm being idealistic, i suppose.

3. slagging dave haggard: this man is not the great satan people are depicting him to be. it's not his fault the ndp in new west-coq lost that election, it's the ndp's fault. i feel terrible for him. had he run from his home riding for his home party, he may well have carried the day. i saw him on election night, i wanted to talk to him, and i just didn't know what to say. he would have been a much-needed bc labour voice in the liberal benches. ... so everyone be nice!

4. jack layton: ran a big city campaign, lost key chances in toronto/vancouver, a total no-show in montréal. unfortunately for the dippers, most gucci socialists went grit red this time around, causing people like revmod to curse the good people of lotusland and hogtown. apparently kennedy stewart was going to win centre (oooh if the election prediction project said it, then it *must* be true) ... riiiight.

5. regionalism: rears its ugly head. québec goes bloc in protest and the western seps are making noise again, claiming ontario and the maritimes are holding us back from social conservative utopia. meanwhile, english canadians find gilles duceppe insightful cos they saw him on a debate once. how do you make a country coalesce?

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